


Never Good

by orphan_account



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Ereri is life, F/F, F/M, Feelings, Hange Zoë & Levi Are Best Friends, I'm Bad At Summaries, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Bad At Titles, M/M, Marriage, My First Fanfic, Nonbinary Hange Zoë, Not Beta Read, One-Sided Attraction, Please Kill Me, Sad Ending, Shrek is Love Shrek is Life, This is going to be so bad, What am I doing, and more importantly why, but eren and levi dont end up together, ereri, ereri without ereri, hange and levi BROTP, im just bad at everything, this is just levi being sad, what even is beta read
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-15
Updated: 2017-02-15
Packaged: 2018-09-24 16:39:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9770726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Ever since they met, Levi has loved Eren.After nearly a year of no contact, he receives an invite to Annie and Eren's wedding. Will his already broken heart survive?This is my first fanfiction ever, and I don't have a plan or anything I'm legit just making this up as I go along. It's probably not long so please read it! I'm 100% open to advise so please feel free to give me some!  This is going to suck so much.





	

**Author's Note:**

> WELL HEY SOMEONE CLICKED ON THIS!! WOW I'M AMAZED.
> 
> THANK YOU SO MUCH AND PLEASE ENJOY!!
> 
> also, this is not BETA read so if you notice any mistakes please tell me.

Sighing, I toss yet another letter into the recycling. It’s unopened, as are all the others that lie neglected in the green plastic tub I'm currently standing over. I roll my eyes, Mother will have to try harder if she really wants me to listen to her pathetic attempts at ‘rebuilding our relationship’, after all, I’d recognise her overly showy handwriting anywhere, and it's not like I'm rushing into acknowledging anything she could potentially have breathed near. I flip through a couple of cheap brown ones then toss them carelessly onto the side board with hardly a glance, they can wait. Once the admittedly originally quite small pile of letters has been reduced to a single envelope, I trudge back to my scuffed - but painstakingly cleaned - table and survey the printed gold lettering that adorns the expensive-feeling paper in my hands. Well, I think, only slightly grudgingly confessing my curiosity, this is rather unexpected. Grabbing a slim silver knife (also meticulously polished), I make a perfect slice along the exterior of the letter, or invite as I realise moments later. 

What I don’t instantly realise, is that this may as well read “I’m going to slowly rip you to pieces” and I would feel no different to how I am about to. Each smooth golden word seems to twist a shard of my soul deeper into a spiralling blackness of misery, and when I’m finally done reading I feel completely unrecognizable as a human who had the ability to feel even a glimmer of happiness.

EREN and ANNIE  
Would be delighted to invite you to  
THEIR WEDDING  
On  
05/09/2017  
At 3o’clock in the afternoon  
At Maria Lodge

Years ago, on the very first day I met him, Eren broke down my world, then reconstructed it in new, beautiful ways that I never would have considered possible if it weren't for him - I glance down without really intending to... just two weeks until he does it again, only this time there will be no rebuilding. I’m not sure how long I spend sitting there as all my thoughts are devoured, leaving me a tattered mess or fraying edges. I’m not sure that I care. Ever since I met him (HIM) time has meant precious little to me. After all, it took no time at all for me to fall for him (some would call it live at first sight - and I find myself inclined to agree) and it took no time at all for him to fall for me, since he didn't fall in the first place.

He’s fallen now, but far from me.

Far too far. And yet I still feel too close.

 

DING DONG

I startle at the far too loud noise, quickly - though slightly reluctantly - surfacing from the ocean of self pity and tears I was drowning in. Fuck, I gasp, shitty glasses said she was coming round today.

“Coming,” I call, hating how scratchy my throat is from crying, hating the childishly scrunched up paper that lies - clearly thrown during a fit of anger - in the corner, as far from me as possible. Studiously avoiding looking at it, I climb stiffly out of my chair and make my way to the door.

The moment the door is open, my “best friend” Hange Zoe proceeds to afflict their obnoxiously loud voice upon my innocent ears, not that that is at all unusual.

“HOW’S MY FAVORITE LITTLE - oh Levi…”  The sudden change is almost amusing, but their hatefully comforting presence is enough to bring a throat racking sob to the surface and I collapse against them and begin round two of endless tears. I would never admit it, but at that moment I’m everlastingly grateful for them, holding me tight and not asking questions (we both know that they'll come later), just lending me the strength that I’ve never needed more than I do now.

 

Surprisingly, I feel marginally better after explaining my situation to Hange, and since I’ve been previously bullied into telling her about my feelings for Eren it doesn't take too long, once I’m done we sit in companionable silence, both sipping at the expertly brewed tea that they made while I told them why I was wailing like a 3 year old when they arrived. I’m beginning to feel a little like my old self again (tea does that for me), until they finally break the comforting silence with the words that I’ve been dreading ceaselessly…

“Are you going to go?”

I look away, feeling empty in a way that leaves room for little else.

“Yes.”

I can feel their incredulous stare, even with my steely gaze averted. I know that they can't understand that I have to go, for me, there isn't a choice. Even though I know Eren probably won't be affected by my presence, I at least need to say a final goodbye.

“I’ll come too,” I turn back around, knowing that my face looks ridiculously shocked but unable to stop myself gaping at the proposal - but at the same time I think of course they are, I would too.  
And, with all decisions made, we relax into our familiar routine, if a little more sombrely than usual.

**Author's Note:**

> Well done for making it through that whole thing, i didnt even read through it after it was done because this is literally just me being bored in the holidays so sorry that it was crap. Thanks for reading and if i can be bothered the next chapter will be up soon. Also, I realise that my pacing was terrible but i have no idea how to improve on that so yeaah
> 
> P.S i am not at all old, in fact i am very young and therefore i am bad at writing. dont judge me or hate on me please lol


End file.
